How did you get on with reflect and relax? (Click here to refer back to the post)
I received a lot of amazing responses from the Call To Action in last week’s email, here’s a small sample:
- “Overcoming many hurdles.”
- “Organising a major event in 4 months which usually takes 12 months.”
- “Losing 20 kilos!”
- “Planning a major overseas trip – getting all the family together – for a major milestone birthday.”
- And this was also shared:
In this post let’s discuss Refresh and Arrange.
I get that relax and refresh are quite similar and that feeling refreshed is often the outcome of relaxing. For this purpose however refresh is about giving yourself permission to add, change and delete.
3. To refresh consider:
1. Decluttering your workspace completely so it’s fresh and ready for 2020: In Marie Kondo’s book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, she says that tidying up isn’t just to keep things organised and clean, it’s to create a space that improves your mind and body.
2. Give yourself permission to stop: this may include reviewing and stopping unnecessary meetings; walking away from people who are not good for you; quitting a bad habit, (James Clear’s Atomic Habits is an easy to read book that can help change habits).
3. Give yourself permission to start: asking for more help; a new hobby (or restart one); break your own rules; JOMO (joy of missing out)
There is something refreshing and powerful about giving yourself permission, especially when it’s a decision and permission followed by action that serves you positively. It’s not about being selfish it’s about self care so you can continue to serve others, instead of from a depleted state, from a refreshed state.
Refresh your thinking…
Do you find yourself getting annoyed or frustrated easily or as the year has progressed annoyance or frustration has slowly creeped in? During Anthony’s last coaching session for the year he shared a realisation that as the year drew to a close he felt like he was becoming quicker to react negatively, what would normally be a slight hiccup would push his hot buttons and it took a little more than normal amount of energy to keep his cool. We explored this a bit further and agreed that this quick to flare was a combination of tired, looking forward to the end of the year plus wanting to ‘get everything done’ before the end of year.
Seth Godin’s post Irritated is a Choice is worth considering:
“It’s a choice because you’re on this path by choice. And it’s a choice because the act of being irritated involves the story we tell ourselves. People are rarely irritated by gravity, because gravity got here before us. If you’re telling yourself a story that leads to you being irritated, you’re welcome to change your story.”
What’s the story you tell yourself that could do with a refresh?
I love the idea of owning your day before the day (or others) own you!
When I feel like life is getting out of control I can usually pinpoint when and why. In October, I was home for only 3 days: I stopped, skipped or loosened the reins on controlling my calendar and some of my systems that support me. I would skip steps because it felt like an ‘in the moment’ gain (one less step now to worry about) but it would always, ALWAYS, be a long term loss. The Book Club for Professional Development read Atomic Habits by James Clear last quarter, and his line – You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems – perfectly sums up this point. Once I picked my systems back up I felt better and achieved more! It was a valuable lesson.
Scheduling is one way to arrange your systems to serve you better. It’s easier to serve others (be the best version of you when your tank is full rather than running on empty).
One way to do this is to grab a 2020 calendar and schedule you and your family first! Consider arranging your calendar in this order:
- Schedule your annual leave.
- Schedule your personal and family events (you could include date nights here).
- Schedule you into every week: what activity or activities will you undertake (or re-engage) so that you are filling up your tank. Your wellness and energy tank.
- Arrange your work week so that you are doing your most important work when you are at your most alert. It can be surprisingly easy to shift some meetings to times where they suit you (sure, not all meetings).
- It might not be easy to plan every day of every week too far in advance but you can schedule planning time into your week. Allocate 20 minutes in your week to plan the next week ahead: it might be Sunday night, Monday morning or Friday afternoon. When is determined on what will work best for you. The key here is to focus on creating a robust process. Success in productivity, goal attainment, habit fixing (dropping bad or adding good) comes down to your processes and systems!
Focus on your arrangements, your systems and processes, that lead to you reaching your potential.
I’d love to know how you get on.